David McNett

From: nugget@dazed.slacker.com (David McNett)
Subject: Re: Lose'95 keyboard.
Date: 1999/03/12
Message-ID: <7cbvu6$o1g$1@uuneo.neosoft.com>#1/1
Approved: bofh@distributed.net
References: <7caofe$f8$1@news.huji.ac.il>
Organization: distributed.net
Newsgroups: alt.sysadmin.recovery


In article <7caofe$f8$1@news.huji.ac.il>,
Nir Soffer  wrote:
>Just got myself a new keyboard. It has the Windows'95 keys. I want to die-
>but then again, it beats the keyboard that had a flaky shift key. Made all
>my text looks like WaReZ DuDe SPeeCH. It somehow knew to turn the caps off
>at vowels. Go figure. It's also a soft touch keyboard, which I hate, but I
>should get used to it. Long live the nifty, cherished, and cool bricktext.

Lest you assume that those silly-looking Windows keys on your Redmond-
induced "Windows Compatible" keyboard are useless, bear in mind that a
neat little modification made with some isopropyl and a razor can make
unneeded keys like this advertise for a free unix. Simply take a sharp
xacto knife or razor blade and make the flying window into a flying L.
Scrape away all the lines of the window except for the left and bottom
using the knife, and rub with a q-tip dipped in alcohol. What you will
create is a "Flying L" key. Now if lusers ask you about it, instead of
killing them and disposing of the body you can take the opportunity to
show them how superior your uberbofh ways are to their pathetic lives.
Users need to be shown how lame Windows is, and this may provide you a
simple and casual way to do so. I still haven't found a clever hack to
eliminate the Win Taskbar key. (I assume that's what the other key is)
Find the key on the bottom right with the drop-down menu and a pointer
right over the first menu option. Actually, now that I think about it,
every GUI operating system I can think of has drop-down menus that are
exactly like that, so there's no Redmond-esqe shame in living with it.
Basically this post was just a chance for me to fiddle with bricktext.
Sorry if you considered it a waste of bandwidth but I'm stuck at work.
Depending on where you look, you may or may not note my true feelings.

Moo.

-/\/


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